I'm sitting here watching The Tonight Show when a local newscaster came on doing a commercial for The Lights Before Christmas. I don't know why it is, but I'm struggling not to burst into tears. I want to go every year, but, and I don't know why, if you don't have kids it's a couples only attraction. I got to go when I was 19. A few years later I went with my brother and sister-in-law when my oldest (and then only) niece was maybe 1, if that old. And I got lots of funny looks from walking around some things by myself. Now, I usually don't mind doing "couples" things by myself. I'm always the only "unaccompanied" guy at the art museum. I'm sure everyone just thinks I'm gay. Big whoop. But that scorn mixed with pity at the Lights. That stabbed me to my soul. Maybe it's the cold weather, everything seems designed to promote a desire for warmth and cuddling. That whole Winter Wonderland, Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow vibe. But when you're alone it's just a withering cold. And all the togetherness just reminds you of how alone you are.
Yes, I realize how stupid this is.
I suppose everyplace has its romantic holiday traditions, but, at this moment, I think I may be close to making up my mind about a few things.